Indulgence
by SakuraSyaoran4eva
Summary: Season One. Post Angel. Valentine's day special. It's valentine's day and Buffy's lonely, but then there's Angel, the vampire she's in love with...


Disclaimer: The plot's mine, everything else belong to the great Joss.

Betad by the wonderful reme

Was meant to be fluff, but then the angst bunny attacked. As sweet as possible, no honey needed.

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Indulgence

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Valentine's Day. Buffy made a face at Cordelia as she watched the Queen C and her latest boy-toy make out in front of the lockers.

"Can you guys, like, move?" she asked snottily, causing the two to move – but not before the teen beauty queen shot her a glare.

She knew she shouldn't be so touchy – after all, today was "National Love Day". Yet she couldn't summon the happiness needed to enjoy today. After all, she currently had no boyfriend and the one guy she wanted, Angel, didn't care to give her the time of day.

Sighing, she ripped a taped bouquet of flowers off her locker: 'Happy Valentine's Day, love Willow and Xander!'. Smiling half-heartedly at her friends' feeble attempt to make her valentine-less Valentine's Day more bearable, she started to pull out her books for next period but then changed her mind.

She really wasn't up for another three periods worth of watching everyone trading valentines and giving play-by-plays of what they'd be doing tonight with their respective lovers. She quickly scribbled out on a scrap of paper that she was going for coffee and slipped the note in Willow's locker, the redhead was sure to share the information with Xander.

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Walking around the crowded mall and taking little sips of her much-too-hot espresso, Buffy watched as couples walked hand-in-hand into the shops.

It made her sick, and for the first time in her life, she desperately wished to be back in sixth period French. Buffy very much preferred Madame Bouveis' annoying hovering over the ''Noah's Ark'' scene taking place in front of her.

A familiar looking brunette walked out of a candy shop and Buffy froze, eyes widening.

"Angel?" she asked and the foresaid vampire froze in his tracks, sporting his familiar 'caught in the headlights' look. He quickly whisked something into his coat and Buffy's eyes narrowed into slits.

"What are you hiding?" The words were out of her mouth before she could stop them and Angel just stood there, glancing towards the mall exit; Buffy couldn't help but feel he wanted to leave.

She wanted to take pity on him, but she couldn't. Angel had walked out of a chocolate shop in the middle of the day – on Valentine's Day, no less; which most likely meant he was planning on giving some girl chocolate. Or, that in the last few days, he'd gotten over her and now had a girlfriend.

Either scenario did not sound good.

_Cordelia._ The brunette flashed before her eyes and she clenched her teeth, forcing the image away. Sure, Cordelia had often flirted shamelessly with Angel, but he felt nothing for the teen queen, right?

'He staked _Darla_, his sire, for you' she told herself, but wasn't convinced.

"So, what is it?" She hoped her voice hadn't shook. Angel swallowed, looking nervous and ready to bolt at any given movement.

"I just – I –," he glanced at the floor, looking thoroughly embarrassed and uncomfortable, "I got something." He pulled a patchy brown teddy bear out of his coat and glanced apprehensively at her.

"I'm not – I wasn't going to give it to you –," he stumbled over his words, sounding much more unsure of himself then Buffy'd ever known him to be. "I just –." He seemed to be at a loss for words so Buffy quickly jumped in.

"No! I-It's fine." She mentally berated herself. Fine? This was the one thing she'd secretly wanted all day, and here she was, acting like she couldn't care less.

"I know that, er," Angel fidgeted again. "You probably don't want it, but I –," breaking off, he held it out to her and Buffy allowed a small smile to grace her face as she took it.

"Thanks." She whispered, staring into his eyes and wondering if, maybe, he was going to kiss her.

She could still remember their first kiss like it was yesterday; the tangy taste and passion unforgettable. He moved in and Buffy pushed her heels up so that their lips were in close proximity to each others. Buffy could practically feel his body heat now…

He was going to kiss her again, she was sure of it.

Just as their lips brushed against the other's, Angel suddenly pulled away, eyes pained.

"Oh…" Buffy let out a shuddery breath, wishing more then anything to feel his lips against hers just once more.

Forcing herself to recompose, she quickly ad-libbed, "Getting too close, aren't you?" Angel swallowed.

"Oh, I –." Sighing, Buffy cut him off.

"No." She took a deep breath. "Just –." She shook her head and offered him a sad smile. "I have to get back to school." Angel nodded, giving her a look of longing.

"Thank you." She said again and nodding bye to him, forced herself to walk away.

"Bye…" she heard angel say but pretended not to hear. Clutching the teddy to her chest, she flashed back to her one and only kiss with Angel and wished she could kiss him again, just one more time.

But she knew she couldn't. After all, Angel was a vampire. She was a slayer – she killed his kind.

They were natural rivals. They could never be together. Not ever.

"Buffy?" Angel's quiet voice sliced into her thoughts and she swallowed, turning to face the man – no, the vampire - that she loved.

He hesitated, "Can I just –." He ran his fingers through his hair, giving her a small pained smile. " Can I walk you back to school?" Buffy nodded to the doors, where the bright sunlight streamed in and he winced. "I mean, we'd have to take the sewers and I know it's a stupid idea, but –."

"Yeah." Buffy nodded her acceptance, smiling sadly. "I'd like that." Sure, they could never truly be together, but it was Valentine's Day. The one day a year a girl was allowed to indulge, right?

She felt Angel's arm slowly creep around her waist and struggled to keep the sad smile from her face.

Valentine's Day, indeed.

SS4EVA


End file.
